In anticipation of the release of my new book, I’m doing the ole Free Giveaway Extravaganza of my old books. Weeee!
Anyway, it’s free and it’s a good time so go to town.
free book
Rip This Book to Pieces and Spit Your Opinions on My Shoes
It’s free… for the next couple days, anyway. Review the crap out of it and explain to me why it gets so little love compared to everything else I’ve ever written.
Lay Her Ghosts to Rest, a women’s fiction novel recently discovered to also fit nicely into the Hen Lit category is a novel of self-discovery through professional ghost counseling and has the fewest free downloads of any of my books.
Are the ghosts turning you off? Because they’re thoughtful ghosts. Mostly harmless. Sometimes preachy. Some of them want to eat your face but most just need some compassion.
Is it the women’s fiction angle? Do you expect much talk of menstruation and hair care? Because there’s none of that.
Download it for free today, tomorrow, or the next day and rip it apart, if you want. I could use ANY feedback about this bad girl. Any at all.
Thanks, friends. I knew I could count on you.
Girl Counsels Ghosts for a Living
Listen, I got 0 reviews and a pretty sad number of orders for this book so I’m giving that shit away for free before it cries. Poor little book’s gettin’ NO LOVE which is totally unfair because it’s a pretty good story.
Download it. Give it a halfhearted review. Tell your friends to do the same. Just… pay the poor thing some attention, would you?
Free ebook on Amazon.com from 12/12 to 12/16
Lay Her Ghosts to Rest
You know that woman who will drop everything to run to your side when you need her but asks next to nothing in return? That’s Catori. And not only is she dealing with your crap on her personal time but she’s doing it professionally under much more stressful circumstances.
Girl counsels ghosts for a living.
When You Give It Away, You Get Labeled
Hey, I’m finally in the category I want to be in! Thanks Amazon!
Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #92,536 Free in Kindle Store (See Top 100 Free in Kindle Store)
- #375 in Kindle Store > Kindle eBooks > Literature & Fiction > Horror > Occult
- #878 in Kindle Store > Kindle eBooks > Literature & Fiction > Contemporary Fiction > Women’s Fiction
- #1834 in Kindle Store > Kindle eBooks > Literature & Fiction > Women’s Fiction
I consider most of what I write to be Women’s Fiction because my main characters are women and those women have STORIES that need to be told. But I get a lot of my sellers rank through other categories… like Occult which is not totally accurate. Horror is not at all accurate, unless we’re talking about the main character’s ex. He’s a little bit of a nightmare, I suppose.
Regardless, Lay Her Ghosts to Rest is getting some attention and all I have to do was, you know, give it away for free.
Get yours for free on Amazon today (and also tomorrow and the next day)!
GiveItAway GiveItAway Now
Time for a Promo!
Aug 29 through Sept 2, Lay Her Ghosts to Rest is Freeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!
I need some readers, you need an excuse to review a book you know you’re better than. It’s a match made in Kindle, really.
Download your copy of my paranormal, self-care, workplace drama, chicklit, speculative fiction book about a lady who talks to ghosts and then tell me how full of crap I am on the review form.
Everyone LOVES wakes and funerals, Eda. What are you even TALKING about? –Morticia McMacabre
I don’t understand the Bob Marley reference. –Heather Lynn Clearbottom
That ghost in the smart red suit sounds great. Let’s hear more about her. –Anonymous Female Politician
It’s wonderful, Sweetheart. I’m so proud of you! –My grandmother
Your turn. Whattaya got for me, reader?
I Can Troll My Own Self
Book promotions are the best! Where normally, my Amazon Best Seller Rank is up there in the millions, when I give these babies away for free, I get to see things like this:
Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #21,973 Free in Kindle Store
- #306 in Kindle Store > Kindle eBooks > Science Fiction & Fantasy > Science Fiction > Dystopian
- #446 in Kindle Store > Kindle eBooks > Romance > Military
Does that mean tons of people are reading my book?! Noooo, not even a little bit. But some people are downloading it. Perhaps some of them are reading it. Maybe one of them might actually like it.
I can pretty much guarantee that the person who hates it leaves a review though. That seems to be how these things work.
1 star review By BigPartyPooper
Subject: Turd books I half-read but am somehow still qualified to comment on
This book deserves negative stars. It deserves black holes. Like 3 million of them. I like stories that are the same as the stories I’ve already read. I want the characters to be so incredibly original that they defy my expectations by doing exactly what I expect them to do. I also want them to think like I would and act like I would and it would be cool if all the chick characters were super hot and into me and all the male characters justified my bad behaviors while also having a smaller penis than me. Also, I’ve never written a book in my life, have no idea what goes into it or any respect for people who try, but I am an expert narrative critic and spellang chompian. Please engage me by disagreeing with me. Please. Somebody pleaaaaase engage me (I’m so lonely).
I should start writing book reviews. I’m like, REALLY good at it.
Anyway, my very first novel, The Homecoming Effect, is still free for the next few days on Amazon and actually, the one and only review I got on it is really positive! And… also written by someone I know who, by the way, is terrible at trolling and needs to worsify her spellang and grammerizing if she ever wants to be a real online book reviewer.
5.0 out of 5 stars
on March 14, 2016
I adored this book! The characters are multifaceted and relatable, even when they are unlikable. A great choice for fans of dystopian fiction, with a fresh voice and vision. Buy and read this book, and you will be wishing for more from this author.
Keep This Gif Handy as You Read
Phase two of giving my lovely books away has begun!
The Homecoming Effect is freeeeeeeeeeee 7/27 through 7/31 on Amazon.
They could also be considered Before and After
Based on a dream I had one time where I sat on a park bench with Daniel Grayson from Revenge fretting and scheming how to take care of the children who weren’t really ours while the world fell apart around us, The Homecoming Effect is a pseudo post-apocalyptic, somewhat dystopian, found family story about a woman who does whatever she has to do to keep her brood safe. It’s fun and dirty and tragic and heart-warming and even though my unconscious dream Daniel looked like Josh Bowman, when I was writing it, he looked a lot more like Tyler Hoechlin (Teen Wolf’s Derek Hale) aaaaand you’re welcome for that mental image… think of him while you read this excerpt:
“There’s a condom in my back pocket,” he whispered, his lips grazing her ear as he spoke. His hands occupied themselves on the top buttons of her blouse. Her hands had been busy stroking the hair at the nape of his neck.
“Wait, what?” Bunny said, pulling back to look at him. Daniel pushed his lips against hers and the temptation to taste his tongue was too strong. She wasn’t going to lie to herself and pretend she wasn’t wanting the same thing, but this being their first kiss, pushed against the kitchen counter in her mother’s house during an unexpected mid-morning visit, she wasn’t sure she was quite ready to throw down that quickly.
His hands slid down her back and over her back side, squeezing then lifting to sit her on the counter. He leaned between her open legs, and she pulled him against her.
I should stop this, she thought, her mouth working against his. He’s… young and I’m… and… there are so many things wrong with this, she thought, wrapping her legs around his waist. His hands traveled up her skirt by way of her knees, her thighs, resting at the crevice below her hips, his thumbs tracing the elastic line of her panties. But… isn’t he starting a job soon, she wondered, and I’ll… be busy with my son, she justified, and we’ll… probably never see each other after that so maybe…
She slipped a hand into his back pocket and there it was, the condom. Two, actually. Ambitious, she thought.
How did this even happen, she asked herself. Not 12 seconds ago, he was knocking on the kitchen door. Not 12 hours ago, he was crying on her shoulder.
Have I mentioned how excited I am for the return of Derek on Teen Wolf Season 6b? No? Well, don’t get me started because I AM VERY EXCITED FOR THE RETURN OF DEREK ON TEEN WOLF.
The Homecoming Effect. In my head, that hot dude is Derek Hale. You’re welcome.
A Little Something on the Side
FREE THIS WEEK
(before the novel it’s based on becomes free NEXT week)
it’s A Flash of Effect!
Four short stories that take you inside the world of the post-apocalyptic chick-lit novel The Homecoming Effect and the character of Bunny, a fast-talking, bull-slinging, fiercely loyal adoptive mother with a powerful Mama Bear instinct and the hots for her young neighbor.
Why should you read it? You mean other than that it’s free, fast, and full of some Strong Female Protagonist love? Because it’s all about those universal themes. Sex, love, children, religion, and government.
Go ‘head now, give it a read!
Excerpt from Safe Sleeping:
“Tell me, though. How did you land yourself some a handsome young thing? You ain’t no spring chicken, girly, but if that man ain’t hardly just a man, then I’m a gov’ment agent myself, come to take your children away.”
Bunny bristled despite herself.
“Oh no, no, don’t go gettin’ upset. I’m so far from bein’ gov’ment, I can’t even spell it proper. But I am a curious bystander here. How is it you’re not hopping on that joy ride in a shelter right now?”
Kat continued to ignore Thea as long as she wasn’t talking about her. For a woman who prayed on the rosary every few minutes, it was odd that she wouldn’t protest such a conversation. But as the belief that Bunny and Junior were legitimately married and biological parents of all three of their children was paramount to their survival, in city or township, she played along with whatever Thea threw at her.
“Oh darlin’, ain’t nothing I wouldn’t like better than to be a good wife to my husband,” she winked. “But three little mouths are enough to feed and rationing don’t cover family planning, if you know what I mean.”
“Rationing don’t cover much of anything a woman needs, does it?” she agreed. “Shame.” She shook her head. “My husband wasn’t hardly the stud that one is but I would take any opportunity I got to get under him again. Crazy or no, he was my man.”
Bunny’s eyes glossed over for just a moment as the sentiment hit her hard in the chest. She wished she could say the same. She wished things had been different after the war. But if they had been, her life wouldn’t necessarily have been better and three of the four boys she spent all her energy protecting would be out on their own and probably separated by now. No, she thought, there was no use dwelling on what could have been when what was here now was what she needed to focus on. She had gotten all the information she needed from the women and felt secure enough in their sleeping arrangements for the night that she could relax and maybe rest a bit with her family.
A Flash of Effect is free on Amazon 7/20 – 7/24. Look for The Homecoming Effect on Amazon, free next week!
Everything’s Coming Up Self-Promotion
Hold on to your hats, my honeys, because this month and next are all about self-promotion.
I’ve got some freebies comin’ atcha! I’ve got some discounts! And then… well, I got a brandy new book available for preorder (soonish) launching on August 11.
Oh yes, that story I’ve been working on since November’s NaNoWriMo? It’s just about done and I’m ready to release that little monkey into the world and see if she climbs.
Apologies to the people on Twitter who liked my tweet:
It’s still true. I don’t follow people and then DM them to buy my book when they follow back. I don’t tweet so much self-promotion that it’s hard to tell if I’m a person or not. And while I don’t always follow back, I do like and RT hashtag tweets I think are swell.
Despite the appearance of hypocrisy, however, I do tweet about my free and discounted and new books when the time comes because… that’s what Twitter is for. That’s what all those free book hashtags are for. I’m not harassing the #amwriting crowd, kids. I’m trying to reach a larger audience.
Still… sorry for saying I don’t appreciate spammers immediately before going into full-on BUY MY BOOKS mode. Sentiment is the same. I guarantee you’ll never ever get a direct message from me.
Coming up:
A Flash of Effect free on Amazon.com 7/20 – 7/24
Short stories that happen between scenes of The Homecoming Effect and expand on the character of Bunny and the world she inhabits. If it was possible to write fanfic about your own work, that’s what this would be.
The Homecoming Effect free on Amazon.com 7/27 – 7/31
What does one do when the world changes dramatically right in the middle of a steamy summer fling? Travel across state lines with your younger paramour and his school-aged brothers, lie about your marital status and claim the children as your own, and settle down in a religious community where only your deception keeps your found family safe?
Sure, why not?
Like Two Opposite Things $.99 on Amazon.com 8/1 – 8/8
Eda’s got a thing for summer flings, my friends, but this one goes waaaaay back to a campground in the mid-90s where our 15-year-old protagonist gets it all wrong in her head before facing the choice between a fantasy relationship full of big gestures and dramatic declarations or the safer alternative of friendship with feelings.
It’s teen 4-EVA love without the sparkly vampires or terminal cancer.
And my new book launches on 8/11. More on that to come …
My Stats So Low
Whoa! Check out the stats now!
Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #6,182 Free in Kindle Store (See Top 100 Free in Kindle Store)
#15 in Kindle Store > Kindle eBooks > Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual & Transgender eBooks > Romance > Lesbian Romance
#36 in Kindle Store > Kindle eBooks > Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual & Transgender eBooks > Romance > Bisexual Romance
Apparently, all you have to do is give it away and those stats go way down. Neat! Thanks to everyone who downloaded it!
Now what do I have to do to get ya’ll to review it?
Eda J Vor 