I’m a proud feminist so when I heard about Day Without a Woman, I was all, “Yeah! Let’s show them! Woo!” until… this morning when I realized that we’re out of cat food and mouthwash and not only was I not willing to NOT take care of my son, not only can I not just NOT go to work tonight, but it also turns out that I couldn’t just NOT spend money.
But I’m wearing a red shirt. At home. Where no one but my toddler can see me.
Friends, I’m starting to think that maybe Day Without a Woman is kind of bullshit.
I think the intent was good. I have a lot of respect for people who go to protests and stand up for injustice. And I recognize that doing what’s right is often inconvenient and that we must make sacrifices if we want to enact change.
But I’m not so sure Day Without a Woman was the best we could do.
Because yeah, our culture is kind of totally crippled when women don’t show up. If I’m not caring for my child, who is? All of my babysitters are female. Most child care workers I know are female. All of the people I see who work in the children’s section of libraries and indoor playgrounds are female. So either I’m watching my own child and failing to “not engage in non-compensated labor” or I’m making some other woman do it and preventing her from “engaging in compensated labor”.
How does this help women?
And how does this show men that they need women?
The men who don’t care about children and the care thereof STILL don’t care if I’m having a crisis of conscience over who is watching my child today because guess what! It’s not them. So they don’t give a damn.
Day Without a Woman means that WOMEN are missing the support system they need to get by. It’s not working for me.
I am a lump. I am a boiled potato of wasted potential. I am a mass of blankets on the couch repeating, “Bud, mommy feels yucky. Can you play by yourself for a little while?” every morning for the past 8 weeks*.
To say I “haven’t written much lately” is a gross understatement and I hate myself just a little bit for it. I’ve been hashtag gaming the same WIP for months now because I have nothing else to draw from. I’ve written down ideas but can’t get the story to come out. I’ve opened blank pages, and unfinished pages, and notebooks and still, I end up on Buzzfeed taking quizzes about food that tell me I’m 18 and single and will never have kids. It’s pathetic. And I’m tired of it.
So I signed up for Camp NaNoWriMo! I did it today. I don’t know what I’m going to write, but DAMNIT, I’m going to write SOMETHING.
Yeah! Take that, life! Take that low energy! Take that raging hormones and mood swings and that perpetual feeling of “am I going to puke or am I starving because I honestly can’t tell right now.”
Hoohooohooooooo! Hahah! Take THAT, haters!
I’ve been redeemed on Amazon as someone (full disclosure, it’s someone I know who thought that review was 100% bullshit bigotry) clapped back at my crappy reviewer.
Dear Kindle Customer,
When you review a book, you are expected to comment on the quality of the writing, not whether or not you agree with the plot points. If you want a different ending, write your own story. This is a coming of age story, not a “story of decision”, which means that it is about the twists and turns of being human. Not every person’s story is the same, and in a world where 99% of the art reflects the lives of heterosexual people, the need for stories representing same sex relationships is huge. That IS the real world. What you are suggesting is actually a tired trope where the girls kiss and then return to their socially acceptable boyfriends. That is a Katy Perry song, not an actual literary suggestion. If you value original writing, then stop tearing down independent writers who are sharing their voice. Write a book, tell a story, start a blog; just CREATE something rather than destroying what someone else has created.
Right? Thank you, literary avenger!
See the original here.